Best Memory of My Life

I was reading my friends post by this title and it set me musing on what I might choose for myself.

I considered by son's birth story, but I put that more in the empowering category.

I considered my wedding day and many delightful times I have shared with my husband, but those were later memories in that they weren't formative of my character.

I considered the philosophical crisis I faced in Poland having just finished reading "Atlas Shrugged" and standing before a small mountain of people's ashes.  I vividly remember that feeling of being divided in two wanting to pray but having no idea if that was simply delusional.  I think I would put that moment in the life changing category.

As I continued to consider, I kept coming back to memories of my family's favorite vacation spot when I was a child.  It's not a single memory, more like a mesh of warm, fuzzy, deeply soothing moments.  The place is called Sea Ranch.  It's on the Northern California coast and it is here where my love for the ocean began.  I still find standing on a cliff by the ocean deeply self-nurturing.  It's such a complete sensory experience and so joyful to me that I feel like I literally soak it in.  I love the sounds of giant waves pounding the rocks while the sea gulls give their eery calls above.  I love the feel of the cool spray, the trembling earth, the wind, the sun.  I love the sights of the deep, deep blue Pacific, the bent cyprus trees, the colorful tide pools, and the sunsets that streak the waters with rippling gold.  I love the salty smells and the wood smoke and the musty pine when traveling through a thicket.  I can put myself so completely in this place that I yearn for it when I've been away for a long time. There is nothing like this kind of ocean setting to sooth my soul; it gives me such inner happiness just to experience this particular aspect of nature.  I have lots of happy family memories too of building sand castles, flying kites, roasting marshmallows, and listening to my dad's stories of far away fantasy lands.

So, I think I would put the mesh of these memories as the best of my childhood.  I would say they were formative just in that they supported me being happy with myself.  It became a solid basis for me to enjoy quiet moments alone.  I didn't need popular approval to relish the little brook I discovered that became my favorite high-school homework spot or a small waterfall in the woods surrounding my college.  These aren't sad, solitary memories; they are peaceful, happy ones.  I think Sea Ranch actually helped me develop independence by fostering contentment with solitary happiness.

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